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rainbow: "count the number of times im magical over new jersey."
me: "get out of my league!"
rainbow: "no, seriously - go counting."
me: "fine. one-two. youre magical twice over new jersey."
rainbow: "thats right. youre right. now dont forget it and get out of here."
me: "dont imaginary-speak to me like im an imbecile."
(pause)
rainbow: "hows your coffee?"
me: "its good thanks."
ten years ago today was 1997. in commemoration ive complied the following bulleted list of associations;
•faxing
•compact discs
•phish
•volkswagen jettas
•"crohn's disease"
•using the name on your birth certificate
•alternately, using your middle name as your first
•alternately, using your middle finger as your thumb
•excusing yourself from the dinner table
•only using "land lines" for phone calls
•the hard pretzel and coca-cola combo
•rico brogna, gregg jeffries
•boycotting titanic
•jackie lasek
•going to the bank to deposit checks
•going to the bank to withdrawal dollars
•that store next to the bank
•not knowing enough to use the word "land line" 8 bullets up
•five dollar whole pizza pies
•being visited by the craig one of 2007
•getting confused as to what he meant by "blog"
•just felt right (courtesy willow)
•kenny g, savage garden
•ted is in vermont with god doesnt even know who
•being graded on a conventional letter grade scale
•bluejeans (courtesy massimo)
and
•wawa
*coincidentally "dot dot dot" is sooo 2008 and "dave matthews band" where dave=dot, matthews=dot, & band=dot is sooo 2009. please dont confuse this with the band dave matthews band which i should have listed in the preceding bulleted list of things that are sooo 1997.
BUT dot dot dot i still found time to go 1/2 (one for two) in high fiving strangers hailing cabs on saturday night. the first time i failed but garnered a laugh from the hailer & her friend. the second time i succeeded but the high five really left little to be desired; it was all finger.
note: this raises my season and career HFA to .400
im biased, but shes really the only good thing weve got going. (ill admit lime fruit bars are also very good).
dear massimo;
¡merry-go-rounding the sun to you! thanks for the many inspirations.
im making love to you,
craig one
this is the stuff of life, i tell you. one day youre high-fiving strangers left and right in a celebration of humanity and the next youre mourning the loss of a true digital friend.
my loving computer of five years is no longer with us. after so much time together he must have tired of me and my nagging requests. when i asked for one more restart he simply said, "no." your last words will linger if not haunt me späggt. i dont think ill forget you, even as i usher in the age of RE:späggt. rest in pieces.
anyone want to get drunk?
this evening i was 1/1 (one for one) in high five attempts with humans hailing cabs. the hailer and i locked eyes as i raised my hand which, i reflect now, was so critical to "success." i watched as he changed his hailing hand into a high five hand, almost losing whatever coolness i even had. but i remained calm like a morning lake (perfect for fishing)!!!!! the slap between us was dry, loud, on time, and accompanied by a "¡yo man!" from my participatory friend. thank you stranger! dont even tell me youre just gearing up for national high five day.
note: this raises my season and career HFA to .333
and 3 = good? are you kidding me? whoever created such a scale needs to seriously re-evaluate.
i like to think of rain as little pieces of heaven floating right on down. which means heaven is one giant pool with occasional leaks. and that makes sense. i just hope its not chlorinated or heavily pooped in by rats.
people hailing cabs are not asking for high-fives. i tried twice tonight with a failure rate of 100%.
i like having you on my planet. happy your own personal new year! alls be well around the sun again. ¡out loud!
